10 Steps to Happiness

Listen to your body’s wisdom, which expresses itself through signals of comfort and discomfortNote: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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World AIDS Day 1st December

 

World AIDS Day raises awareness in the community about HIV/AIDS, and the need to support and understand those living with HIV/AIDS.  The day also promotes the importance and need for education/prevention initiatives. Services such as Needle Exchange Programs (NSP) assist in preventing the spread of blood borne viruses such as HIV/AIDS, hepatitis B and C. ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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A Sick Cycle of Dependency

A Sick Cycle of Dependency

Being dependent on others almost comes natural when we are in a state of confusion.

We seek others opinions, beliefs, and advice. What others say, if we place them in a position of authority, becomes “The Word.”

A.A.’s FREEDOMS

I craved freedom.

• First, freedom to drink;
• later, freedom from drink.

The A.A. program of recovery rests on a foundation of free choice.

There are no mandates, laws or commandments. A.A.’s spiritual program, as outlined in the Twelve Steps, and by which I am offered even greater freedoms, is only suggested. I can take it or leave it. Sponsorship is offered, not forced, and I come and go as I will....

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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A Sick Cycle of Dependency

Being dependent on others almost comes natural when we are in a state of confusion.

We seek others opinions, beliefs, and advice. What others say, if we place them in a position of authority, becomes "The Word." ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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5 Ways to Please Your Man In Bed

Women in recovery from alcoholism, addiction and co-dependency often may need new skills in the bedroom. These 5 tips may help.

Want to give your man a thrilling experience like never before? Here are 5 really simple ways to make your lovemaking hotter, steamier and more passionate, starting tonight! ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Masculine Grief is Different

The following was recently shared on an Adult Children of Alcoholics e-mail group and I was so taken with it I decided to post it here with the permission of its author. Enjoy.

Masculine Grief is Different...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Look to this day

Recovering members of 12-Step fellowships may find this proverb similar to our Just for Today principles.

Sanskrit Proverb

Look to this day
This very life of life
In its brief course lie all ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Beyond Roses and Chocolates

Beyond Roses and Chocolates

Our partners can be remarkably out of touch with understanding what gets us in the mood. Instead of limiting seduction to fancy dinners, suggest that physical intimacy on any given night is more likely if:

AA Offers Recovery, Not Religion

AA's spirituality is often misunderstood.

In September 2007, the U.S. 9th Circuit Court of Appeals ruled in favour of Ricky Inouye, a Buddhist drug offender who was sent back to prison after dropping out of a treatment program based on Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). Inouye sued the state of Hawaii, maintaining that AA is a religious program and that being required to attend it is a violation of the First Amendment....

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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At Last The Perfect Relationship!

Overheard at an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting, this 12th-step conversation between sponsor and newcomer:

"Tom, I've spent years and years looking for that ideal relationship. I searched for someone I could trust, and who would trust me....

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Coping With Alcoholism / Addiction in the Family

Try to adopt the following approaches to your alcoholic / addict;

1. Try to learn the facts about alcoholism and other drug addiction. Keep an open mind.

2. Recognize addiction for what it is-a disease of the body, mind, behavior, and spirit from which people can and do recover. Like other diseases, nobody really intends to get it or wish it upon their loved ones once they have it. Try to remember that the alcoholic / addict in your family isn't doing this at you. This is a disease beyond will power....

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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One Day at a Time Slogan

 

This slogan describes one of AA's primary strategies for staying sober. For many alcoholics, the concept of permanent abstinence is too overwhelming an option.

Most, however, believe that they could stay sober for a twenty-four hour period, if necessary. ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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World Federation Against Drugs

The World Federation Against Drugs (WFAD) is a multilateral community of non-governmental organisations and individuals. Founded in 2009, the aim of WFAD is to work for a drug-free world. The members of the WFAD share a common concern that illicit drug use is undercutting traditional values and threatening the existence of stable families, communities, and government institutions throughout the world....

Note: Cross posted from Alcohol Self-Help News.

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Addicted to Love

Addicted to Love: Sex, Love & Compulsion

Living tales of Pleasure and Pain

Their faces are the faces of addicts. See if any look familiar.

• Ben is a successful attorney. Married with three children, his life looks exemplary and he seems destined for great public achievement. But Ben also leads a secret life, revolving around visits to prostitutes and adult book stores. Lately, he's taken to cruising the World Wide Web, downloading porn and searching for partners in electronic chat rooms and online hook-up sites. ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Anger & Recovery

Adapted from "Learning to Love Yourself: Finding Your Self-Worth" by Sharon Wegscheider-Cruse; Health Communications, Inc., 1987.

Anger is a word we apply to a wide range of feelings. . .

• Anger can be as simple as a minor irritation. ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Psychology of Children with Alcoholic Fathers

Psychopathology of Children with Alcohol Dependent Fathers.

SUMMARY; Objective: In this study, we aimed to research cognitive, behavioural and psychopathological differences between children of fathers with alcohol dependency (ACOA’s) and children of fathers without alcohol dependency (non-ACOA’s). ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Women's Sexual Fantasies

Top 10 Women's Sexual Fantasies

Women in recovery may identify with some of these fantasies. Others may have experienced them in their drinking / drugging days.

Every woman on earth has fantasized about some explicit sexual fantasy that she may or may not have been too ashamed to talk about. Whether it's your girlfriend or your wife, this top ten list is sure to touch on a forbidden fantasy of her own....

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Help an Alcoholic 1

Don’t make it easy for the drinker to keep on drinking

Discontinuing “enabling,” along with putting the onus for the drinker’s behavior and its consequences on the drinker.

Do not cover up for them. Let them be responsible for their actions. ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Help an Alcoholic 6

Detach, separate, walk away

Somewhat at odds with the message of continuing love and compassion is the more "tough-love" message that comes from many people – some of whom give both suggestions. ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Help an Alcoholic 8

Take care of yourself

"Live a full life of your own."

"Make sure you live a life of your own that does not depend on the undependable person."

"Carry on with your life after you’ve let the alcoholic know you aren’t babysitting anymore." ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Help an Alcoholic 9

Be there for them when they’re ready

Most comments on this subject go like this: "Be available when the alcoholic reaches out." "When they hold out their hand for help, grab it." "Help as many times as you are asked. Be there." ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Help an Alcoholic 10

Learn about the disease

This is a bit like the picture at left – can you see other faces in the flowers and the disease of alcoholism?

Understand the nature of the chemical alcohol, how alcohol affects the alcoholic and the non-alcoholic in different ways, and why the alcoholic continues to drink when drinking is obviously harming them. Learn about the early-, middle-, and late-stage symptoms of the disease and how these symptoms change as the alcoholic continues to drink. Learn about the underlying physiological changes, including adaption, tolerance, physical dependence, and the withdrawal syndrome, all of which have a profound effect on the alcoholic’s behaviour. Finally, learn why the alcoholic needs to drink, why he becomes irritable, frustrated, and depressed when he is not drinking, and why his sincere promises to stop drinking are washed away like writing on sand....

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Dysfunction Fantasies

Dysfunction people have many beliefs. Not all of these are in one person but if there is a great many then that person may be dysfunctional.

Alcoholics, addicts, codependents and Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACOA’s) may identify with these.

Dysfunction Fantasies

Al-Anon Helps Members Reach beyond their Fears

Al-Anon Helps Members Reach beyond their Fears


Those who live with alcoholism often live in fear: fear of abuse, fear of anger, fear of trusting others.

The Art of Living

The art of living lies not in eliminating but in growing with troubles.

-- Bernard M. Baruch

Naturally, we wish to avoid pain and difficulty, but life experience and a measure of reflection show us that most of what comes our way is beyond our control. We'll never outwit all the possibilities for trouble, even if we live to be 100 years old. We have often failed to learn from trouble because we cast ourselves in the roles of passive men and victims. We pointed outside ourselves and said, "Look at what is happening to poor me!" ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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The Sexual G-spot, Male and Female

Rediscovering your sexuality in recovery may hold many pleasurable surprises. One of these is the discovery of your G spot. You have always had it but may have been too stoned / drunk to notice its subtle, but satisfying, effect on your orgasm. ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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MP3 Recovery Tracks for Lesbians in Alcoholics Anonymous

MP3 recovery tracks for lesbians in Alcoholics Anonymous at XA Speaker site.

Click on the link to go to a description of the track.

Or see link at bottom for XA Speaker home page.

NB: Some MP3 tracks may include gay and bisexual recovery stories....

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Renew the Sexual Passion, Please

 

People in recovery may be returning to a relationship or trying to rediscover the passion of earlier times. This article from Readers Digest may be of help.

You and your partner can rediscover intimacy and pleasure with these tips....

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Finding Love When Over 60

The Dating Game at 60+

People in recovery from alcoholism, addiction, co-dependency and compulsive gambling often find themselves alone again.

But, there is no need to be lonesome whether heterosexual, gay, lesbian – male or female....

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Masturbation in Recovery

"Seeking sexual satisfaction is a basic desire, and masturbation is often our first teen natural sexual activity. It's the way we discover our eroticism, the way we learn to respond sexually, the way we learn to love ourselves and to build self-esteem."  -Betty Dodson, renowned artist, author and sex educator ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Women's Sexual Health

Many women in recovery from alcoholism, addiction, compulsive gambling or co-dependency may identify with this sexual health survey.Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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10 Benefits of Love

“I need somebody to love,” sang the Beatles, and they got it right. Love and health are intertwined in surprising ways. Humans are wired for connection, and when we cultivate good relationships, the rewards are immense. But we’re not necessarily talking about spine-tingling romance. ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Beyond Roses and Chocolates

Setting the Mood: Beyond Roses and Chocolates
from the Womens Sexual Health Center.

Women in recovery from alcoholism, addiction, co-dependency, compulsive gambling and ACOA may find this article helpful....

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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Alcoholic Beverages Containing Caffeine

FDA to Evaluate Safety and Legality of Alcoholic Beverages Containing Caffeine

“The increasing popularity of consumption of caffeinated alcoholic beverages by college students and reports of potential health and safety issues necessitates that we look seriously at the scientific evidence as soon as possible.” -- Dr. Joshua Sharfstein, Principal Deputy Commissioner of Food and Drugs, FD...

Note: Cross posted from Alcohol Self-Help News.

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AA Preamble

The AA Preamble is;

A statement which briefly explains the purpose of AA. The preamble is read at the beginning of most AA meetings. Is is based on a portion of the foreword to the first edition of the Big Book.

Defining Alcoholics Anonymous

Following is the definition of A.A. appearing in the Fellowship's basic literature and cited frequently at meetings of A.A. groups: ...

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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A BRIEF HISTORY OF THE 12 STEPS

Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) started in 1935 in Akron, Ohio, USA as a result of the meeting between a New York stockbroker and an Akron surgeon who were both hopeless alcoholics.

They realized that alcoholism was a disease that could be treated by a system of applying spiritual values to daily living.

Both men began working with themselves and with other alcoholics.

In four years, there were three groups and 100 sober alcoholics.

 

In 1939, based on their experiences (both the failures and the successes), the fellowship published its basic textbook, Alcoholics Anonymous, describing the AA philosophy and methods, and establishing the Twelve Steps. This book has been in continuous publication since then. Although it has been revised and updated, the Twelve Steps have remained the core, touching the lives of a countless number of people around the world.

Shortly after the founding of AA, the families and friends of alcoholics banded together to form AL-ANON, an organization that teaches the Twelve Steps to individuals who are most affected by the alcoholics in their lives.

Since then, other groups have adopted the AA philosophy and successfully applied it to many problems.

There are, for example, Twelve Step groups addressing

• drug abuse (such as Narcotics Anonymous, Cocaine Anonymous, Crystal Meth Anonymous),
• support for substance abusers’ family and friends (such as AL-ANON, ALATEEN, NARANON, Co-dependents Anonymous),
• other addictive problems (such as Debtors Anonymous, Gamblers Anonymous, Workaholics Anonymous, Eating Addictions Anonymous, and Overeaters Anonymous),
• relationship issues (such as Incest Survivors Anonymous, Relationships Anonymous, and Parents Anonymous), as well as
• mental health issues (such as Obsessive-Compulsive Anonymous, and Emotions Anonymous).

24 Workplace Actions of ACOA’s

  Adult Children of Alcoholism / Addiction in the Workplace

ACOA's often transfer behaviour learned in childhood into other adult spheres of life. In true co-dependency style these often confuse and confound us.

Some of these are;

1. We confuse our boss or supervisor with our alcoholic parents and have similar relationship patterns, behaviors, and reactions that are carryovers from childhood.
2. We confuse our co-workers with our siblings or our alcoholic parents and repeat childhood reactions in those working relationships.
3. We expect lavish praise and acknowledgment from our boss for our efforts on the job.
4. Authority figures scare us and we feel afraid when we need to talk to them.
5. We get a negative gut reaction when dealing with someone who has the physical characteristics or mannerisms of our alcoholic parent.
6. We have felt isolated and different from everyone around us, but we don't really know why.
7. We lose our temper when things upset us rather than dealing with problems productively.
8. We busy ourselves with our co-workers' jobs, often telling them how to do their work.
9. We can get hurt feelings when co-workers do things socially together without asking us, even though we have not made an effort to get to know them and join in the social life.
10. We are afraid to make the first move to get to know a co-worker better, thinking they will not like us or approve of us.
11. We usually do not know how to ask for what we want or need on the job, even for little things.
12. We do not know how to speak up for ourselves when someone has said or done something inappropriate. We try desperately to avoid face-to-face confrontations.
13. We are sensitive and can get extremely upset with any form of criticism of our work.
14. We want to be in charge of every project or activity, feeling more comfortable when we are in control of every detail, rather than letting others be responsible.
15. We may be the workplace "clown" to cover up our insecurities or to get attention from others.
16. We are people-pleasers and may take on extra work, or our co-worker's tasks, in order to be liked and receive approval from others.
17. We do not know how to be assertive in getting our needs met or expressing a concern. We may have to repeatedly rehearse our comments before delivering them.
18. We have felt that we do not deserve a raise, promotion, better workspace, or a better job.
19. We do not know how to set boundaries, and we let others interrupt us. We can accept more work without knowing how to say ‘no’ appropriately.
20. We are perfectionists about our own work and expect others to be the same and have the same work ethics and values.
21. We become workaholics because it gives us a feeling of self-worth we did not get as a child.
22. We may jump from job to job, looking for the perfect position as the substitute for the secure and nurturing home environment we did not have.
23. We get upset when people do things that affect us or our work without asking us first.
24. We have a high tolerance for workplace dysfunction and tend to stick it out in an unhappy job because we lack the self-esteem to leave.

After the ACOA laundry list of characterisation.

See also;

• Adult Children of Alcoholics
• Al-Anon May be able to help
• Alcoholic Family Roles
• Workaholism

Note: Cross posted from Recovery Is Sexy.com.

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11 Ways to Detect and Solve Internet Addiction

11 Ways to Detect and Solve Internet Addiction

People in recovery are always in danger of switching addictions from alcohol, drugs, gambling or co-dependency. This article may help if one follows the tips before a real addiction develops.

Better Oral Sex

Better Oral Sex

Many people in recovery from alcoholism, addiction, gambling and co-dependency may be exploring their sexuality from a new perspective. Safer and more enjoyable oral sex can be an exciting experience.

A List To Live By

A List To Live By

SPIRITUAL AWAKENING « Recovery Is Sexy.com

SPIRITUAL AWAKENING @ Recovery Is Sexy.com

Spiritual Awakening is a process that happens within us. It is recognizing that a power greater than ourselves exists and can assist us if we will just ask for help and guidance. We do not have to “do it on our own.”

Risky Partners and Domestic Violence

Risky Partners and Domestic Violence

Specific characteristics of male partners, relationships and women’s mental health are significantly related to exposure to intimate partner violence in the past year. Identification of these indicators has implications for the clinical care of women who present to health care settings.

Alcohol Reduces Birth Rates « Alcohol Self-Help News

Alcohol Reduces Birth Rates «

Alcohol Self-Help News


Study lead author Brooke Rossi, M.D., of Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston said the research showed that even moderate drinking could impair IVF.

Good-Enough Sex

Good-Enough Sex

Whatever our ideal turns out to be, we must be willing to grow toward it.

Am I an Alcoholic? – questionnaire. « Alcohol Self-Help News

Am I an Alcoholic? – questionnaire. « Alcohol Self-Help News

The AUDIT was developed under the auspices of the World Health Organization and has become the main instrument used to identify ‘at-risk’, problem, and alcoholic drinkers.

Dance & Humor for Recovery

Dance & Humor for Recovery

I like to watch comedy too. I think that joy and laughter is very healing. There is a book and a movie called “The Anatomy of an Illness”. In that story the author explains how joy healed him when nothing else could.

Poll: Is recovery from alcoholism / addiction sexy?

Poll: Is recovery from alcoholism / addiction sexy?

What is your experience with people in recovery from alcoholism, addiction, codependency, and ACOA.

Were they sexy when practicing their dysfunctional behaviour?

Have they become more attractive since being in recovery?

Cast your vote in this poll.

Is recovery from alcoholism / addiction sexy?

Surrender to Win

Surrender to Win

“Before A.A., I could not, or would not, admit I was wrong. My pride would not let me. And yet I was ashamed of me.

AA and Spirituality

AA and Spirituality

Given its prominence in Alcoholics Anonymous and related Twelve-Step groups, spirituality plays an important role in the rehabilitation of many substance-dependent people.

Depression & 12-Step Programs

Depression & 12-Step Programs

Major depression in patients with substance use disorders: Relationship to 12-Step self-help involvement and substance use outcomes.

Stay Humble or Stumble

Stay Humble or Stumble

To be humble is to be balanced in our opinion of ourselves.

Narcotics Anonymous

Narcotics Anonymous

We are recovering addicts who meet regularly to help each other to stay clean. There are no dues or fees. The only requirement for membership is the desire to stop using.

Hottest Articles, Recovery Is Sexy

Hottest Articles, Recovery Is Sexy

Alcohol and Sexuality

Mature Women and Sex

Women’s Sexual Fantasies

Signs and symptoms of eating disorders

Characteristics of Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACOA’s)

Sensual Massage

Women’s Sexual Arousal

5 Ways to Please Your Man In Bed

The Sexual G-spot, Male and Female

Alcoholic Family Roles

Sex for Men Over 50

About

12-Step Speaker Tape Links

Erotic Fantasy

Porn Addiction

10 Reasons for Low Libido

Alcohol Related Brain Injury

Alcohol side effects

Relapse is never an accident

10 Masturbation Myths

Recovery from Alcoholism

Recovery from Alcoholism


The number 13 represents bad luck for some people, but for Floyd McCrory of Rockville, Md., it’s a sign of continuing good fortune.

This year, he celebrates 13 years of sobriety.

“Best thing I ever did,” he said about quitting drinking. “It turned my whole life around.”

Addiction Beyond Substances | Self Growth Engine

Internet Sexual Addiction Beyond Substances | Self Growth Engine

Bored? Masturbation. Angry? Masturbation. Sad? Masturbation. Stressed? Masturbation. I went from being the first of my class to the very bottom, until I dropped out for good.

Poll: Is recovery from alcoholism / addiction sexy?

Poll: Is recovery from alcoholism / addiction sexy?

Alcoholic and Codependent Games

Alcoholic and Codependent Games

Dual Personality – Person who can change “hats” at the drop of a dime, between portraying a rational person and the other one irrational. It’s like living with Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.

Seven reasons I drank

Seven reasons I drank

For the alcoholic there are only seven reasons to drink:

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23rd Psalm for Recovery

23rd Psalm for Recovery

The Lord is my sponsor, I shall not want.

He makes me to go to many meetings.

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